Fathers Day

Happy Fathers Day to these two amazing guys! Bronson and I are so lucky to have them in our lives. 
Gary, you have always been so accepting of me. you've never judged me. you have always been there, whenever i needed it. you've opened your heart to the people i've loved, with no questions or concerns. you've trusted my judgement, even when it was not the best. for that, i am so blessed to have you in my life. thank you. 

to my love of my life, jon. i don't know where i would be right now with out you. you are so patient with me. especially with bronson. you calm me down when i most need it. you listen to me, when i need to vent. you get a bit awkward when i cry, so that's good it doesn't happen very often. but i know you. and i know you aren't great at the communication of the crying emotions of a woman, but who is? i can only imagine it's pretty hard to deal with. but thank you for this past 23 months of fatherhood. for all the support. for letting me have girls trip with no guilt or questions asked. for working around my schedule and yet still making money. for being there with bronson. when you are here, you are present! that makes up for the time you are gone for the 4 days out of the week, times 1,000! i would rather a father gone 4 days out of the week and present 100% for those other 3 days, then to have a father who is here the whole week, but not really present at all. not really engaged, and not really caring to see their boy grow. but you are all over it. the minute you come home from work, you instantly swoop bronson, and tell me to take a break. tired or not. you take the initiative and get shit done. you are super mom/dad/boyfriend/contractor. i don't know how you do it, but you do. and with such grace. you make it look easy. i love you, jon.  

15 months

happy 15 months little B! i keep telling people that you are actually turning into a toddler. you have an opinion. a voice. one that doesn't like not getting what he wants. you stomp your feet and have melt downs. i hate to say you are having pre mini tantrums, but that's what it sure looks like. :( you laugh with and smile with glee when you are happy though. which is most of the time. 80/20. 80% perfect, 20% fussy. part of that is due to some huge swollen gums from your molars coming in. i am surprised you have no back teeth yet, since you have been an early teether for the front ones. 

these days:

you eat quite a bit. your favorites at the moment are egg yolk. cottage cheese. yogurt. cheese. salmon. pinto beans. bananas. grapes. blueberries. apple sauce. and of course milk. you drink massive amounts of milk and water. so much, that you leak through your diaper up to your chest every morning when we come to get you. dada usually brings you down stairs in a whole new outfit that i put you to bed in. 

you sleep through the night. which is nothing new. you've always done that. except for a two month period when you were 8-10months old. i have no idea what was up with that. you suddenly just started waking up, then you suddenly just stopped. you're so weird. you nap once a day. we are slowly moving that back later in the day, so you don't have such a long afternoon stretch to stay awake for. this is making some of our play dates more difficult, yet some easier. the ones that you are on the same sleep schedule as the other babies. you still nurse. morning and night. i think i will keep nursing you throughout flu season, so until march or so. which is way longer than i anticipated, but hey, if it keeps you less sick for another season, then i'm on board. i didn't sign you up for music class this session. the MAIN reason is, your mama is a freak! and scared of germs and flu season. yes that's right. i'm crazy. but i like to say i'm a preventer. i will do all i can to prevent harm or sickness to come your way. and that my dear is just ask for the flu. being in a tiny room with the heater on with a whole bunch of other kids sucking on toys and putting fingers in each others mouths. gross. i even, when no parents are looking, anti bacterial wiping the whole play ground. no seriously. and i wipe your hands after too, because you suck your thumb a little too much. i wash your hands when we get home after every outing with warm water and soap. i have a cover for the grocery cart, that i use for high chairs at restaurants as well. i have a silicone mat i put on the tables at restaurants for you to eat off of, so your food doesn't touch the table. i sanitize my phone so you can play with it, and our whole house! i am not normal. i hope you don't get me and your dads OCD-ness from us. maybe a little bit of it, like wanting things to look perfect, like laundry and stuff. but not the other stuff. it's annoying and it drives me crazy that i'm like this. we were going to take you to Orange County for X-mas to visit GGClaire, but now we are making her come here instead, since i was was going to fly with you and dad and Zoe were going to drive, but i didn't want you to get Ebola or the new weird virus called Enterovirus that's killing and paralyzing kids. usually ones with pre existing medical  conditions like asthma, but still. that stuff frightens me. watching or listening to the news gives me anxiety. ever since this Ebola outbreak, i haven't been able to sleep good. i have buying bottled waters and organic milk that is sealed so it doesn't need to be in the fridge and lots of pouches of food for you just incase we need to isolate ourselves in the woods someday. 

on to something else. like your dog. you still love her. and she's learning to love you more. i think. well, a lot more tolerable with you climbing over her at least. when we let her in from outside, you look at her, and then you sprint and race to her bed and face plant into it. you make sure she's following you before you start to head that direction. it's the cutest thing ever. you are pretty gnarly with the cat these days. you tack him. you point to his nose and pull his whiskers and tail. you chase him the house and give him hugs. you are infatuated with him.

your books are your quiet time. you will just sit with your books and speed flip through the pages real fast, or look at one page for a really long time and point to things. everything you point to, i tell you what you are pointing at. your favorite books right now are "pete the cat" "wheels on the bus" "down by the bay" and "farmyard". those are your go to books you always want me to sing/read to you. whenever i start singing you your raffi books, you instantly start dancing with one hand in the air. 

changing your diaper is impossible these days. i actually dread the times when i have to actually change your diaper. you yowl. you twist and turn. you don't straighten your legs. ever. i usually have to get you the house phone, or this cardboard box i won't let you play with, unless it's for diaper changing, so you actually lie still. i hope one day you will get better at this. 

you absolutely adore your toys. all of them. especially the ones with wheels. you can literally play with your toys for 20 minutes at a time without my attention or help at all. sometimes i will just sit and watch and admire you. sometimes i will go off and do some things, like clean the kitchen, or dust. when i vacuum you like to assist. you love the noise of the vacuum. you love to push the vacuum. you are so independent. i love how you can entertain yourself without the need of another human. i can hardly do that. haha. you get that from your dad. 

i let you watch shows on netflix once in a while. i said i would wait until you were two, but you're not that into it, so i'm not that worried about it. you watch for like ten minutes, then you're over it and on to the next best things. but on a rainy day, it's fun to sit on the couch and snuggle. you are becoming closer to that age when you can just chill with me and not move. i'm hoping. probably wishful thinking. 

you kick balls. you throw balls. you can put balls in holes. you can pick up legos and put them away. what's more impressive is that you can comprehend what i say and take direct orders. you run your diapers to the diaper pail. you run your trash to the garbage can. you love to throw away things so much, i find some things in the garbage that aren't supposed to be thrown away. like your magnets. you bring me things i want. you tell me what you want, either by signing, or pointing, or me asking you, and you either nod yes or no. you sign: more,milk,all done,water,later,up,sleepy,ME,hungry,brush teeth. 

at dinner, when somethings really good, you say MMMMM then "good" and nod your head yes. you pretty much moan MMMMMM the entire time you eat though. when your silent, i know you're really tired. like tonight. 

your words are: Elliot, Mama, Dada, UP, Down, Banana, Good, Cheese, & Hi. 

you woof when i say 'whats the dog say' or when i point to a dog, or when you hear a dog. you pull up your shirt and grab your belly when i say 'bronson, where's your belly?' and you tough your head when i say 'where's your head?' you touch your nose and sometimes pick it when i say 'where's our nose?'. we are working on ears, which i think you have down by now. you are really easy to train. you are very trainable. kind of like Zoe was. She was just an easy dog to do tricks with. and your are that way too. not to compare you to our dog, but she is like our other child as well. 

man, there are just so many things i want to tell the world about you, and how smart and lovable you are. you give the BEST hugs and blow the BEST kisses when asked. you're starting to give real kisses too, which are really cute. you wave good bye, very stiff handed. especially when you want dada to leave the room so you can get onto breastfeeding before bed. you are just about the best little companion a mom could ask for. and today, i want to honor YOU. and thank you for choosing me as your mother. as your friend. as your side kick. and thank you for being so healthy. i am so lucky and fortunate to have you in my life. 

14 months

happy fourteen months. i can't believe this. you are so charming bronson. you charm everyone everywhere you go. to the grocery store. to lunch. shopping. the park. you smile every chance you get. you get this little nose crinkle now when you grin. it drives me crazy! the big thing is, you walk. you walk everywhere! you walk all around the side walk waddling around like E.T. you walk down the sidewalk. you walk all over the play grounds. YOU WALK! and it's so fun! this is by far my favorite stage of yours. you're so independent. maybe a little too bit sometimes. as in, you only want to feed yourself and hold your spoon. you love using the big boy sippy cups. you still love food. you get picky occasionally, but only because you can, and it gives you something to have control over. otherwise, you don't stop eating! ever. i'm a lithe less strict about your diet, and it has made our lives so much easier. i don't have to stress so much on always having food for you, and i know i can always count on a kids menu. grilled cheese sandwich? yes please! i always ask of course, do you have unsalted butter? they say no, and i say, ok. :( i don't add any salt to your food still, but the occasional salt at a restaurants ok. i don't give you sugar yet either, but i'm sure it'll happen soon. and you will love it. 

you sign lots and say a few words. you sign 'milk, more, hungry, all done, water' you have a new sign now that you made up and it means "ME!" you slap your chest or tummy with your hands. you also do this poking thing when you want more of it. like my boob. you poke my other boob when the one you're on has run out of milk. which happens all the time, because i have no milk anymore. my supply is drained. almost. i am trying to keep you breastfed throughout flu season. 

you say "DOWWWWNNNN" just like that. when you want to get down from somewhere, which is usually my arms. you say "nana" for banana. you've said "elliot" for a while now. you say, "HIIIII" and pretend to talk on a phone. this is either with a real phone, a fake phone, or just anything that resembles a shape of a phone, like the remote control for the tv. 

you wave good bye. a lot of times way after the fact, but you do it. it's this stiff fast wave. you really love to wave good bye to your dad when he is done reading to you and hands you off to me, because you know you're about to get boob. you are hurrying him to leave the room so you can nurse. you blow kisses..and then run or reach toward the person you are kissing to with mouth wide open. it's very sweet. 

anyways little man. there are always things i love about you that i want to write about, but i always forget until you do it again. i need to keep a little note pad by me so i can jot down what it is i love. but keep up the good work of growing up. you are obvi super smart, and are on the way to be super obnoxious, but i love it. and i'm ready for it kiddo. keep dancing. keep smiling. keep laughing. 

love you so much.

12 month check up

i am pleased to say that bronson gained weight. and grew.and his growth chart graph went up, from a low 20th percentile to a whopping high 23rd percentile. YES! 

weight: 19.5 lbs

height: 28.5 inches

diaper size: 3 

hemoglobin: 11.5 (which is in range)

lead: negative 

we have finished most of the series of vaccines. just started hep A series. we will start MMR and Varicella at 15 month check up. 

goals for this month: we are going to work on building things and saying a couple words, besides mama and dada, and the occasional blurred, slurred attempt of Elliot. we are going to try to eat more beans and lentils. we are going to re-try egg whites without breaking out in hives. and we are going to try strawberries. oh and we are going to WALK! we pretty much can, but crawling is just so much easier! 

1 year (a day late)

happy birthday bronson boy! it's been one year and a day since you were born. you have NO idea how crazy this thought is. that you've been in my life for this long, and i have so many more days to be with you. i seriously can't wait to see what those days bring. 

you are seriously the funniest guy ever! you laugh at everything. you dance when you hear music or if i sing to you. you laugh out loud just because you can. you head butt us just because you like the sound of our heads clunking together. you drive cars ALL day long, and say 'vroom vroom' while driving them. you love Elliot cat. you even try to say his name. it sounds like a muffled blurred together elliot though. you see cats in books and you point to them and say 'elliot'. you are the smartest. books are your favorite. you chew the bindings of your favorite ones with your little shark teeth. the big thing right now is you take steps. sometimes 5 or 6 of them, but usually only 1 to 2. you take more steps when you are holding something in your hands and are distracted. you have no idea you are walking. when you take a couple steps you are aware and timid, and usually fall straight to crawling. you are a pro crawler. sometimes i have no idea how you got from point A to point B so fast. you eat everything! i vacuum like twice a day. or am picking up the tiniest little things so you won't eat them. it's very annoying! or i'm annoying. you are a pretty small guy so far. you are just growing out of your 6 month clothes and starting to wear your 9 month clothes. i buy 12 month clothes for you, and they are HUGE! i'm pretty sure you will fit into those clothes when you are about 2. not kidding! at the rate you're going!

i pretty much just want to tell you, i love being your mama. i couldn't ask for a better job. we have become connected to old friends that have had kids that i lost touch with. we have a whole new crowd of people we see. it's nice to reconnect. it's sad that so many people lose touch just because of a baby. i understand it now, and am trying my hardest to stay in touch with my friends without kids. this is where you realize what kind of friends you have. and what they are willing to do for you and how far they are willing to go. i am so grateful for the friends and family in my life. 

bronson, you will soon learn how important family and friends are. this is why i am so adamant about you having play dates and making life long friends. these kids will be there for you through thick and thin. they will make you laugh when you need to the most. they will be by your side on the most important days of your life. and they will be there for you when you go through a loss. these are the people you need to cherish. without these people, life will be hard. i hope you love and respect these people the way i do. i've only known you a year, but i'm pretty sure you are on your way of becoming the most selfless, compassionate, open hearted person i know. you are a cancer. you are sensitive to others and have deep emotions. this may be hard at times, but in the long run being emotional will be your best asset in life. 

i love you big boy. you are SO loved. 

xo, mama

skater stance

fourth of july (2 days late)

water babies

this is jack. bronson's soon to be best friend, they just don't know it yet. jack is only three months old, so isn't too interactive yet. but will be in the next couple months i'm sure. that is when they will realize they love each other like it's nobody's business. jack is pretty much as big as bronson, as you can tell in the picture. given, his mom is like 69-70 inches tall, and dad is probably like 72 inches. and i am like 61 inches short. there you have it. jack will be huge and b will be short. jack's mama lauren is one of my bestest friends. i am so proud of her. she is a natural at this mommy thing! we love you baby jack and i can't wait to watch you grow up along side with mr B! 

11 months (a day late)

i am a day late in wishing you a very happy 11 months. it hasn't been the best month, but we survived. your papa got hurt and hasn't been able to work..on the upside it's been nice having him home every night for dinner and bed time. you got very sick with roseola. your papa got poison oak from zoe. elliot cat got a fox tail wrapped around his eye ball and had to go to the vet. and me, your mama is recovering from the worst case of mastitis ever! probably from you being sick and nursing every hour and making my supply of milk go way up. and then going back to normal when you felt better and me getting engorged, which led to an infection. i tried going into work yesterday and ended up having to leave only after 3 hours. i had a major fever and chills and just couldn't bare it any longer. i was so cold, when i climbed into my 90 degree car to drive home, it felt so good, i just sat in there for like 10 minutes and warmed up. today my antibiotics have finally kicked in. i am still in pain, especially when you feed, but at least there is no fever and chills to go along anymore. 

today i felt well enough to take you for a play date at the river. you got pretty tan just from the walk to the beach. then i freaked out and slathered sun screen all over you hoping you wouldn't get skin cancer right then and there...you had fun playing in the water with your yellow dump truck. i am trying to get you used to cold water, because you start swim lessons next month, and i don't want you to freak out because it's not a heated pool. i am already freaking out because i hate water and don't want to get in the cold water to give you swim lessons. maybe i will just make your papa do it. hehe. 

your new major skill you do is throw things. i've been kind of avoiding this one. i haven't really encouraged this one for a while, but you are just doing it on your own, so now i have to. yes, you throw tows across the room. you hit me with your toys in the face. OMG you are obsessed with anything on wheels. or anything that rides smoothly across the floor while you drive it along crawling. it's very cute. you are so fast. 

today you attempted to take that first step, and fell flat on your forehead. we were still in shock about the first step that we didn't react very fast when you started to cry. then i picked you up and handed you off to papa, and you just gave him the biggest proudest grin. you're so tough! 

you're getting pretty good at signing. i love being able to communicate with you. we need to start teaching you new things now, but i want to make sure you get the basics first, which always have to do with eating of course! 

it's been such an adventure watching you grow bronson. i am always so astonished and amazed by you. your capability to do things. your excitement. your laughter. and your love that you show and give us. you are so easy to be around. sometimes i wonder if having you will be enough for us. since you are so great. just you. on your own. and i don't want to ruin that. 

love you my little man. you are almost a year! i can't believe it!

last week sucked

we had a rough last week. b had his first sickness ever. which consisted of a fever for four days straight. at one time it got over 103.5 and i almost had an anxiety attack. thank gawd jon was home and able to be the calm one, and to keep me relatively calm as well. (not really) but he tried. luckily he stayed very well hydrated, actually he would just gulp water down out of the sippy cup every time he would wake up..and his appetite was good until the last day. but still ate. just wasn't as into it as he usually is. i took him into my work and they said it was viral. then i took him to the pediatricians and she said it was viral as well, but to not be surprised if he brakes out in a rash. and if he does, well it will be Roseola. sure enough the rash came. yay! it feels good to have a diagnoses. 

b is feeling 100% better now and is back to eating and smiling and being his old happy self. we are so happy to have our boy back to normal. i've got to admit though, having a sick baby did make the days very relaxing. it was the first time since he was a new born where he would just lay on top of you and not move. and just sleep or just hang out. it was nice to cuddle. unfortunately not under the best circumstances. 

three good reasons i'm glad B got sick. 

1. he is immune to this virus for the rest of his life.

2. i got to cuddle with my boy for the first time in a long time.

3. b learned sign language really well. especially the sign for milk. oh man, i'm in trouble with this sign. but it feels so rewarding to see your baby starting to sign back to you. even if they get mixed up, or he alternates more and all done, which confuses the shit out of me. i have no idea if i should give him more or stop. but the milk sign never gets confused with anything. thats for sure! 

new favorite thing

to crawl to the top of the pillows of the bed, and to roll and or throw himself off of them. while giggling the whole time. sometimes he face plants. sometimes he has a perfect 360 roll. sometimes it's not as cool as the previous time, so he tries to add additional rolls while on the flat surface. which doesn't work out so well, but is still just as funny to him. and to us. oh man. this boy is a wild one. 

i.l.p.

bronson's new nick name is impatient little piggy. apparently jon has renamed our son this. food is a BIG deal to this kid. if you are eating something, guess who comes crawling up your leg wanting whatever you're having. yup. lots of grunting, pulling, tears start happening if it's not baby edible. very impatient. very little. very piggy of himself. much like, ME! these days we have to sneak off to shove something in our mouths, or else..we have to feed the beast! 

some of our favorites are: ground beef. chicken. salmon. rice. pasta noodles. cottage cheese (which he hated the first time, but now loves)especially mixed with peaches. yogurt. blueberries. oatmeal. broccoli. and of course sweet potatoes. 

dislikes: raw tofu. i will try again next week. he did this with cottage cheese the first time as well. and 3 weeks later tried again, and he loves it. i think it's the texture of both that he disliked, or dislikes. avocado is kind of becoming in the the dislike category, which i am very bummed about. i give him avocado at least every other day since he was 6 months. he eats it, but doesn't scarf it down like his other food. and sometimes he makes the worst face ever when eating it, but still swallows it. i am hoping this is a phase. because i love avocado so much, i can't imagine my child not liking it. even my dog loves it. 

it's been a fun 4.5 months introducing new foods, even though i am scared of him chocking on everything. i have anxiety when meal time comes around for this specific reason. i can't wait for those molars come in. :)

10 months (a day late)

happy 10 months old my big boy! yesterday. i can't even handle how fast you're growing up. mentally. physically, you're still the size of a 6 month old, so that part doesn't astonish me as much as the cognitive part. you are so damn smart, sometimes i am just baffled on how you would be able to do something at your age. or maybe it's more at your size, and the age part is completely normal. whatever it is, you are smart. you are funny. you are the sweetest thing ever. you give the tightest hugs, especially when you are feeling shy in front of someone you don't know. you KNOW your Zsa Zsa, Memaw, and Nana Leslie. you know your baby friends and their mamas. you know your music teacher Annie and all the little toddlers in the class. and most importantly, you know your parents. and that is the best feeling anyone could feel. 

your papa and i were just talking about how strong you are. and if there was a baby arm wrestling competition, you'd probably win. sometimes you are stronger than me. you push off me when you don't want to be held, and i can hardly hold on. you twist and turn and wiggle until you are loose and fee to roam the grounds with your dog. you love your dog. you share your puffy snacks with her in your walker. you eat one, then you give her one. its a sweet gesture and all, but we don't give our dog table food. 

food is always the highlight of your day. you love your food. and you seem to never get full. i usually stop feeding you when your belly is ready to explode. you pretty much eat all finger foods, not many purees anymore. you've got the pincer grasp down now. along with pointing. you point at everybody and everything. you even point at our noses and eyeballs, and then hook it with your nail, which hurts like crazy. everything you do to us these days pretty much physically hurts us. you nip. you grip our skin with your nails. you slam your head in to ours, which hurts us more than you i think, and you slap in the face. it's all a fun game to you. 

you are a champ in your walker. you can cut corners, reverse, and pivot all with your little tippy toes. you can climb out of it if you really want something in front of you. you run into cabinets and open all the drawers and pull just about everything out you can get your hands on. today you learned to ope and take out each individual baby wipe out of the package and to taste test each one. good thing they're honest. 

lately you have been able to stand without holding on to anything for a good 20 seconds. you can even squat down and pick something up too. we saw you even stand up from sitting. just once though. you squat all the time from sitting. you are so close. you do a cool move where you kneel on the knee and put your other food on the group. we call it the 'captain morgan' pose. 

i think my most favorite thing you do is dance. you wiggle your upper torso and just grin as wide as your little cheeks and mouth will let you. or if you are on all four, you wiggle the entire back and butt in this spiral motion. this happens anytime you hear music. or even if you don't. you still dance. it's just too much. so is your laugh. it's contagious. when you laugh, my laugh is always followed by it. i can always make you laugh by tickling 
your feet, or by blowing on them. 

i can't wait to see you grow into this amazing dude i think you're becoming. they say that babies temperaments in the beginning say a lot of what they will be like when they are older. and so far. you have been such a joy. obviously we both have our moments. like when you are tired, or teething, or hungry. but we have had a nice teething break this past month. it's been quite nice. much love to you baby b. 

love mama

truckee

happy birthday dada!

happy happy birthday to the best dad/friend/bf there is out there. these two and me are so lucky to have you in our lives. thank you for taking time off and for such a great mini family vacay to mendocino this week. it was a nice treat to have you home. we love you dada! 

love, mama, B, Zoe, and Elliot. 

Nine (a day early)

OMG nine months old?? holy smokes big boy. i am a day early because i leave for LA tomorrow morning and won't have time to do this. the 9 month check up isn't until next tuesday, so i have no idea on any of his vitals. but i assure you, he's still small. i do feel like he's grown because he can walk around in his walker now. which is kinda cool, but kinda sucks. i'll be doing dishes and he will come slamming into my ankles at full speed. pretty hilarious actually, but it hurts. like everything else he does to you. and if you're not watching him carefully, he will be in the kitchen opening drawers. those are not baby proofed yet. we will get on that. he's figured out how to open things. this has been fun. (more baby proofing to do). he likes to stand and pull out every single diaper and wipe off the stand. he likes to sit in boxes and be pushed around. -box car racer- he is not walking yet, but getting to standing is becoming a piece of cake for him. i still wonder if he will walk before 12 months. i just wanted to wish a happy 9 month birthday to best cutest boy in the world before i left on my trip. and i hope, no i know B and dada will be ok without me. (not sure w/ out my boob though)wish i could just leave those behind. haha. this is the longest i've left him..but he's so used to being away from me for 11 plus hours at work, so i think we'll be ok. i will be drinking for like the first time too since before my pregnancy. (minus that one glass of champagne in Tahoe 5 months back) i am excited to get away for a girls weekend of fun! jon says i deserve it and not to worry and to have fun. and to relax for once. will miss these boys tremendously. 

i love..

i love your smile. especially when you are looking straight at me with our noses touching. i love the laugh that comes out of that smile. you make me laugh more and more everyday. your laugh makes up for a hard bad day with you. i love how intrigued you are with what i'm doing. have it be opening mail, eating, writing a grocery list or on my phone. your eye balls follow me with such concern, then always followed by a big grin. i love how you collapse your whole head and body back and stare at the skylight/ceiling/walls when i carry you up the stairs. i love how you prefer to sit in a big pile of books while i read to you, gnawing on each and everyone. i love your excitement for toy cars, or anything on wheels. i love that you are not scared of water, and in fact would prefer to always be touching it in some way. have it be in the bath, or the faucet, or Zoe's water bowl, or drinking it with a straw. i love that your Vitamin D is still the best thing you've ever tasted and everyday you get excited for it. i love how you can't sit still EVER, so when you do for a split moment, it is the most calming second ever. i love that after i feed you at night before bed, you twist to the side, climb on top of me and actually lay flat on me give me the biggest squeeze ever and rest your head sideways while sucking your thumb. this is the newest thing you do and i absolutely ADORE it. you don't fall asleep breastfeeding anymore, but you know when bedtime is because you nuzzle up. i rock you in the chair and sing to you, or shhhhh you. then i stand up and sway you until your entire body just collapses. no stiff bone in the body. i lay you down in your crib and tickle your back until you close your eyes and are still. now why can't naps be like this?! i love coming down stairs to see what position you are in. usually its this sprawled out face down star fish. when it's cold, you are curled up with butt in the air. i just wanted to share a few things i love about you. there are a million more things i love about you, but these are the ones that are fresh in my mind. i love you baby boy. 

kitkitdizze

we did a little photo shoot with gary a couple weeks back out at his place on the ridge. here is a little unedited sneak peak of what's to come. photo by the talented Simon Weller. the two portraits of gary were done with this amazing huge film camera simon had. 

music together

today we started our first mama and baby music class. we are doing it with our friend kazumi and her little girl kaede. the class was super fun and filled with lots of other sweet mama's and kiddos. (even twins!) we were of course late for our first class because someone decided to sleep in on this particular day, but it all worked out. bronson of course, was the center of attention. literally. he crawled to the middle of the room and sat there the whole class just smiling and laughing at everyone. a mommy at the end of the class said he was stealing everyone's hearts the whole time. we played lots of fun instruments: rattle eggs, drums, wooden clappers, rain sticks, and scarfs. ooohhhh scarfs. bronson loved these!!

there are all ages in this class. most about between 1-2 years old. a couple infants, like almost new borns. and a couple that looked to be bronsons age, but were maybe younger (but bigger than b) because they were sitting but not crawling around...like i'm sure they would have been if they knew how. everyone was surprised to see bronson crawling around, until i told them his age. then they just seemed shocked at how small he was. yes guys, i know, he's tiny. like me. 

today i also noticed a white new tooth coming in. it's on the bottom left right by his bottom two teeth. which is a bit out of order. i just think he's just going for it and going to sprout all of them this next couple months. hey, at least we're getting it out of the way now. right?! jon thinks he see's one on the top too, right by the two front teeth. no wonder he's not sleeping through the night anymore. he does this thing that sends chills through my body. he grinds his top and bottom teeth together constantly. it drives me nuts and gives me goosebumps. i absolutely hate it!! 

all in all, i do believe this music and me class was a huge success. he seemed to enjoy himself and others company thoroughly! now lets hope we can make it on time next time. 

spring time

the weather has been amazing. meaning lots of park days. lots of vitamin D and sunshine. lots of stroller rides. and lots of smiles.and a new big boy carseat! yay!